Do you actually LISTEN when you have a conversation? I mean, really listen? Or do you only hear the first sentence from the other person and immediately begin thinking about what you want to say next? Example:
You: Hi, Jill, I haven’t seen you in a long time!
Her: Hi! Well, I just got back from a big birthday trip to France. Boy, we had so much fun – we celebrated birthdays, anniversaries, and even retirement! It was April in Paris!
You: We were in France last year. We went to all the Michelin one-star restaurants because they were a good bargain for great food. We even had a sunset dinner on a riverboat to watch the lights come on from the Seine! It was just fabulous.
Her: Oh, that’s nice. (As Jill walks away, she is thinking; Well, I was going to say more about my trip but somehow it’s turned into ‘all-about-you’.). See you some time.
Don’t be a turn-it-around-to-be-‘all-about-me’ person!
Ask a lot of questions – and let the person answer them. You’ll sharpen your listening skills, and you’ll get to know someone a lot better. As a bonus, you’ll find people will like you more for it.
And don’t worry – some day it really will be your turn to talk.